The Six Year Plan: Bro Time

Dear Readers,

This weekend, I was spending some time with my close male friends, or "Bros" as the kids these days say. In the spirit of Brommunity, I decided to incorporate guest writers Neal Kennedy, Edward Schillo, and Drew Kennedy, and also they had gotten me a bit too solid to stand on, a bit too loose to hang on to if you know what I know what I mean.

So, Bro Time is a very important time for the well-adjusted young adolescent male. Its the time where you can say whatever you want, fart as loud as you please, and get "un"pleasantly drunk without legitimately pissing anyone off.  Its a time for a free exchange of ideas, modeled upon secret societies that have existed since ancient times, wherein experimentation and advancement of knowledge is welcomed.  Only within such crucibles can it be discovered that the gin-beer float is in fact a delicious treat to delight any pallet while still very effectively inhibiting the senses.

The reason that Bro Time is so important is that college age men are constantly on "the hunt."  This is a bio-sociological phenomenon wherein men at this age are expected to pursue as many sexual conquests as possible, a task that most adolescent males take seriously, with or without proximate success.  Because of this impulse, young men often will not act naturally when in the company of prospective mating partners, consistently acting with purpose rather than freely. For this reason, Bro Time is not a totally misogynistic event, as "Bro Chicks" or girls that have come to not be considered pure objects of sexual consideration, and can take part in Bro Time.

At this point Readers, I don't want you to think that I've given in to oversimplification.  The point of this article is not that all men think about is sex.  The point is that they do think about things other than sex.  Therein lies the importance of Bro Time. Its the time in a bros life where he can focus on things other than sex, and come to truly learn and grow as a person and as a bro.

But you know, fuck it.  I don't need to explain myself to you.  I am content with being awesome, and this post is distracting me from that.

Until Next Time

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